Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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