its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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