Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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