I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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