I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
