I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
