If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
