Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
