I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
