I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
