pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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