Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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