I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize