there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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