Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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