We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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