so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
