You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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