yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
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She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
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He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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