I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
