the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize