The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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