So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
