If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
this just has baby written all over it
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
