Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize