he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize