i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
well most of my day revolves around power hour
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
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