They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
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