would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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