I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
