we made out on top of his cat.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
