I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
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Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
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If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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