i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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