our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Can I color on your dick again?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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