Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
