It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
