vagina is talking i cant
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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