Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize