I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
