Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
porn star boner night. come get it.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
