so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize
