I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
