Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Randomize
