somebody snuck up and got me drunk
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
