so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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