Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
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She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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