why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
