ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize