Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
