6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
as a side note pls kill me
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