My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize