OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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