We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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